The Journal of Abraham Nermal: Welcome to Nightwick
Heard from a grubby little fellow getting drunk in a Nightwick alley,
So let me tell you a thing or two about the mausoleum in the ole abbey. I went with a bunch of charming chaps, a rather rude inquisitor who inquired all too impolitely of the local clergy, a dancing frog, an impoverished southerner and some hulking lad named Flint.
The place was overgrown with vines, save the dead graveyard. Brown grass and unearthed graves. But the graves were dug up from the bottom up , and truss me..I know the difference. I guess the sun's rays did em in cause thar tweren't nuttin but dust and webs near the graves. Seven of em, one fer each sin.
The Mausoleum had a couple gates, both unlocked, that is where the horror began. Moving into the fell place we saw dust and manleather, far too much of each. Stone coffins everywhere, some poor saps had tried to make a barricade out o the lids. Didn't seem to work, there was another arch that lead further in.
We looked through that arch to a room with more stone coffins and big ole statue. and defeated two vampyrs still that stone coffins, put thar heads in me sack and made sure they had a stake in thar ribs. Then this horrid scribblin an a scrabblin came from a dank and bottomless pit we found in the room. We aint cowards but the noises mades us all pale, we heaved a lid from one of them fancy stone coffins over the pit, and somethin started clawin at the stone.
A bit nervous and sweaty we moved into a room to the west, saw the otherside o tha barricade that never got finished. Three more vampyr's killed in thar fancy stone coffins, three more heads in me sack. Evil frescos glowered at us from the walls an we kinda lost it, we screamed the name o the lord and the very halls hissed and bled. We carved crosses and smashed the mocking images on the walls, we sent smoke billowing up...and found a locked hidden door. We began looking through the vampyrs stone coffins fer a key and found one. We thought it a moment of good luck when those hideous eyes...
I won't go into what happened there, but the southerner had a lung ripped through his back and eaten, nearly did im in but for a grace of god. We fended off the beasts as we could, they feared the cross but not for long. We hope we barricaded their hideous warren that leads to hell itself, but we don't know if it'll hold, or if we be foolin ourselves like the poor saps with the other barricade.
We retreated to the sunlight, but the inquisitor, the hunter..he wanted to look in the big hall. We used the frog an a rope to get to the roof, and the inquisitor, praising me for my bravery with a promise of new boots, made the lonely trek next. I know not what happened next, but within moments spears were flying over the roof and the unholy chanting of a blood orgy was reverberating through the walls. The inquisitor's body fell from the roof and the Frogling soon came clamberin down after.
Tales o' a thousand goblins, dancing in thar blood orgy spewed from the frogs mouth.
The lord help us, they be in our churches, they has our relics and they be invertin our symbols!